Cunnilingus by Craig Kurtz

 

“The learn’d, the wise, the grave, the gay
in its embraces take delight;
‘tho hid, they adore it in the day
and often kneel to it at night.”
— Edward Ward, The Dutch Riddle, circa 1700.

 

I’m going to speak to all the gents
who might lack some experience;
but this advice is also good
for most dames, in all likelihood.

Cunnilingus is the best
so give that phallic push a rest;
the old cliché of chaps well-hung
falls short compared to a long tongue.

You’ll want an organ with good taste
when traveling below the waist;
in faith, no lady wants a poke
since licking’s better to invoke.

Forsooth, this proves more popular
if you would really happy her;
for, troth, the pleasure palace likes
some soft caresses, not crass strikes.

The nicer be, the more she craves,
so down ye go, ye saucy knaves;
’tis fun to osculate the clit —
so succulent, so exquisite.

First up, ye buss her underwear —
do not advance without moisture;
and if she bids ye fair exhorts,
continue, and untruss her shorts.

Behold that lovely pubis hair
which has a scent beyond compare;
the view from here is true divine —
so worship well her holy shrine.

Now, bring thy face into her quim
and say you love her synonym;
she wants to know ye venerate
her womanliness incarnate.

If she assents, acquaint the lips
of your mouth with those in her hips;
then, give a slight vibrato from
your tongue to the place where she’ll come.

Breathe through your nose as you give head
and cosset that posh oyster bed;
go slow and subtle, note her speed —
she wants a good time, not thy seed.

Her breathing rises to and fro
with undulations down below;
her labia craves a French kiss —
this is romantic coitus.

The moisture means she’s having fun —
no one tastes fair like your loved one;
be always patient and discreet
and lick in time to her heartbeat.

Her clitoris, that nubbin of
afflatus stimulating love,
will now desire, at its peak,
a tongue that oscillates mystique.

And when ye hear a lusty yell
ye know that ye have rung her bell;
it gives ye pride to coax those moans
from deep inside her carnal zones.

Now, when her orgasm doth crest,
desist all pressure, I’d suggest;
release slowly your loving mouth
and tremble from that ‘dining south.’

Then, when she’s done, with throbs and sighs,
do nuzzle thanks upon her thighs;
and this is how to guarantee
a merry wife will loyal be.

That ‘eating pussy,’ vulgar called,
will guarantee that she’s enthralled;
aye, cunnilingus is the best —
forget thy penis, ’tis a pest!

Now, swiving, as a gen’ral thing,
proliferates couples’ offspring;
to tip the velvet’s just for joy
so pucker up, and don’t be coy.

 

©2020 Craig Kurtz

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