Trumpenproletariat by Craig Kurtz
I’m voting for the candidate
who says he’ll make the country great;
you got a problem with that, mac?
well, there’s the wall, and don’t climb back.
To cronies and you lobbyists
who think that Santa Claus exists:
the working class is fighting mad,
this ain’t the right-wing of your dad;
like Perot, and under oath,
Trump trashes Clinton and Bush both;
you got the donors and cartels,
I’d rather dingbats and dumbells;
whether Soros or Romney,
it’s all NAFTA and TPP;
they say that Trump’s a ‘global threat,’¹
they’re not done outsourcing jobs yet;
the negative ads will not stop,
they go a million bucks a pop;
and when elected, then they’ll spend
our taxes like they’ll never end;
the media went shock and awe
and Godwin broke his Godwin’s Law;²
they called Trump ‘Hitler,’ early spring —
come fall, what’s left for the left-wing?;
but, wait, we got the Sanders’ folks
who think democracy’s Twin Oaks;³
to all of you on welfare checks
who get food stamps for drugs and sex:
you occupied Wall Street (yippie!),
to end up voting Hillary?;
the ‘lesser of evils’ (your loss),
I’d rather vote straight-up chaos!⁴
Republicans and Democrats,
bipartisan for Goldman Sachs;⁵
but, low-info, the choice is this:
it’s Yoko Ono, or it’s Kiss.
¹ According to The Economist Intelligence Unit; The Guardian, March 17, 2016.
² Mike Godwin, “Sure, Call Trump a Nazi,” Washington Post, December 15, 2015.
³ Income-sharing commune, based on B.F. Skinner’s Walden Two.
⁴ Bush called Trump “the chaos candidate” at the fifth GOP debate, December 15, 2015.
⁵ Campaign donor for both Clinton (fourth largest) and Ted Cruz (whose wife works there).